No way Im a parent!
by MissPervyKey
Summary: One day 4 kids suddenly open the doors to the fairy tail guild the problem...Lucy, Natsu, Erza, and Gray are the parents to the kids Parings- Jerza!, Nalu, Gruvia mainly
1. Chapter 1

**Hey! im with a new story after i had some ideas some here's something i rambled in my head**

**Me: Nat-kun do the disclaimer!~**

**Natsu: refusing is in progress**

**Me: Dont be a smartass and do the disclaimer!**

**Natsu: Geez Key doesn't own Fairy tail if she di-**

**Me: I woulda continued, Nuuu endings! ...wait did fairy tail end really?**

**Gray: Why is your name key?**

**Me: Why is your name gray?!**

**Gray: ...Ok**

**Me: Shuddap! Enjoy~ oh TO the Bros and Sistahs who read The Field trip to hell or Dimensional finds dont get your panties in a bunch the next chapter is almost done okay! and this is my second try on a Fairy Tail fic after the horrible songfic... but hey it was meh first c: **

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It was a nice day even if it was 78 degrees and felt like 83, either way there were hardly any clouds in the sky, the air was crisp and a faint honey dew could be smelled everyone in magnolia was in a bright mood, there were even not so much crimes this past few days making lucy happy that she can have a break which was impossible with gray and natsu around

"Fire spit!"

"Droopy eyes!"

"Charcoal brain!"

"Ice cream!"

"Ash face!"

"Princess undies!"

"Pyro!"

Lucy twitched_ 'If they say another wor-'_

"Snowman!"

Lucy closed the book she was reading and slammed it on the table creating a deadly and killer aura matching to erza, Gray and natsu flinched

"Natsu, Gray.." Lucy said ever so sweetly then quickly hitting them with the book making a bump on their heads

"Humph" she sat back down to continue reading her book ignoring the whimpers from gray and natsu

"Lucy is weirder than usual" Natsu rubbed the spot lucy hit

"Aye sir!" Happy agreed happily eating fish all of a sudden the guild doors opened

There at the door was a girl about 12 years old with spiky light pink hair that ended at the middle of her back, she had big brown eyes and toothy sharp teeth, she wore a outfit identical to natsu but her vest was closed and also had keys on a belt by her hip and some combat knee high boots like lucy

"See I told yah we come back!" The girl exclaimed giving a goofy grin then sticking her tongue at someone behind her then four more kids appear next to her

The first one looked 12 too, she had long red hair which was tied up in a high ponytail and brown eyes she wore a blue and burgundy striped pullover shirt with shorts that showed half her thighs and ankle black boots

The second was a boy who looked older than the red hair girl, he had spiky blue hair and the same brown eyes but a little darker, he wore a grey and black checkered shirt with a grey t-shirt underneath

"Uh huh..." The blue haired boy gave a blank look at the pinkette

The third was also a boy, 13 years old too, He had black hair and dark blue eyes his shirt was no where to be found and had grey cargo shorts

Finally the last of them was a 13 year old boy, He had spiky blonde hair with some pinkish hue, he had the same eyes as natsu and outfit but the vest was closed and had one sleeved with a brown belt and had the same scarf and a black wristband on his left wrist and black sneakers

The kids walked in the guild like it was a familiar place but the whole guild didnt know who these kids are!

The pinkette spotted natsu and put a big heart warming smile on then ran towards him

"Daddy!" She was caught by him

"Wait wha-" Natsu looked confused

"Hey dad where mama?" The blonde hair kid asked, Natsu just gave him a confused looked

"Natsu whats with all the commotion?" Lucy walked from the bathroom but got a hug from a strange boy and girl

"Mama! lets go you promised so did daddy!" The pinkette whined

"Daddy's girl" The blonde boy teased

"Mama's boy" the pinkette pouted

"Whiny baby"

"No fair nii-san~"

"Whatever nashi" The blonde boy waved her off

Mira started squealing

"Hey nii-san where's mommy and daddy" The red hair girl asked the blue haired one

He then pointed at Erza who was happily eating her strawberry cake not noticing what was going on (Who doesnt when your eating the most delicious cake evar *Erza told me to*)

"Mommy!" She suddenly hugged erza

"Who are you" Erza asked trying to keep the stutter out her voice

"Its me kazumi..." She looked at erza with hurt, erza jumped slightly feeling guilt with she saw that look

"Yo Pops!" The black haired boy yelled he then spotted gray and ran

"Dad! you were worried weren't you!" He said playfully with a big smile but gray just looked at him

"Who are you?"

"Dad your suppose to be in your twentys your not suppose to forget" The boy took a sigh "Hellllooooww its me zayd!" he cupped his mouth and earned a sorta scowl-confused look

Some seconds gray burst out laugh with tears in his eyes

"Oh man thats a good one!" Gray said between laugh smacking a table he calmed down and looked at the black hair kid

"alright who are you _really_"

"Uh I think I can answer whats going on" the blue hair boy spoke all eyes were on him now

"Alright were here from the future" he earned some gasp with that then he pointed at nashi and her brother

"Do the honours of introducing yourself" He finished with a bored expression

Nashi got on a table while her brother looked at her sweatdropping

"Yosh! im Nashi dragneel at your service!" Nashi put a fist in the air

"Please get down.."

"I inheirted my mama's magic!" She said proudly showing a key

"Its not the zodic keys cuz mama has 'em" she shrugged

The brother sighed at nashi "My name is Kasai dragneel" He said then taking the book lucy sat down and hit his sister with it

"Nii-san! your weird!"

He gripped the book and patted the end of it in his palm "Wanna say that again"

"No nii-san" She sat on a chair silently

"I inherited my father's magic" He finished then his hand burst in flames making natsu look at his hands and lucy look at nashi's keys

"My turn, The names Zayd fullbuster dont wear it out" Kasai stood up

"Zayd zayd zayd zayd zayd" Kasai teased and smirked when zayd had tick marks on his head

"You fire hazard!"

"What you gonna do about it huh" Kasai put a sly grin on "You gonna freeze me oh no how im so scared of getting frostbite!" His grin grew wider seeing zayd grow tick marks around his head

"You charcoal brain" Zayd threw a punch

"Hey what you do that for dork!" Kasai punched back it didnt take to long before they started a brawl and everyone laughing at the sight

"Alright a fight!" Nashi shouted now everyone was fighting, elfman was shouting MAN, someone stepped on erza cake now that someone is facing erza's wrath, Mira was smiling, Kazumi was standing by watching the people fight as so was her brother

"Ne nii-san why did mommy didnt know me..." Kazumi looked disappointed and looked down

Her brother gave her a comforting look "Its that we in the past, this is where mama was younger" He wiped her cheek with his thumb "Now show me your smile it'll make me so happy kazumi!" He gave a smile of his own

She then gave a warm hearted smile "Thanks Keith uh nii-san" he smiled when she said his name

**(After that fight~)**

"Alright who are you kids" Makarov asked looking at the group of 13 and 12 year olds

"Your grandchildren" Zayd gave a dull look and nashi chopped him on the head

"Haha very nice" She took a breath "N-n-nat-tsu and l-lu-lucy are our mama and daddy" She stuttered blushing, making the last part of natsu and lucy high pitched it was very weird saying her mother and father name** [1]**

"Im nashi dragoneel, celestial wizard and this is my older brother Kasai dragoneel, fire dragon slayer"

Natsu and lucy looked at the kids, looked at each other and looked away blushing well... lucy of course

"Alright go to your parents" He shooked his head to natsu and lucy

"Alright lay it on me" Makarov crossed his arms

"Im zayd fullbuster, son of g-gr-gray fullbuster and ice wizard" He sighed and got the same signal

"And lastly you two i can already guess who your parents are well go on"

"Hi grandpa, Im kazumi fernandes and this is my older brother Keith fernandes, I use re-quip magic like mama and keith has some of daddy's magic" She shook keith's arm to distract him from a game he was playing on his phone

"Huh..Oh hey granddad" He waved slightly and sitting in a chair

Erza just sat with big eyes very surprised and blushing

"Well it seems you finally married jellal!" Cana pat her back drinking from her beer

"H-hey!" Erza shouted, her eyes still big as saucers

"Hey how many times im going to be jumped on!" Natsu shouted with nashi on top of him with lucy giggling and kasai faceplaming

Some of the guild members were laughing

"Lucy, erza, gray, natsu go home and take your children you can take a break for today" Makarov smirked while the rest nodded then walked off with the kids

**(At Lucy's house~)**

"Who else hungry?" Lucy asked at the kids who were sitting on the stools beside her kitchen

"Meee!" They answered back with their hands up

Lucy smiled and went back to the stove while erza, and gray were in awe watching lucy act like a aunt and mother

"Food!" Natsu and nashi cheered and digging in

"Om nom nom nom om nom!"

Lucy and kasai sweatdropped

"Mama can I have strawberry yogurt" Kasai politely asked which caught lucy by surprised

"Sure" She gave him the yogurt she had in her hand and gave it to him then got another from the refrigerator

Gray whispered to erza "Weird lucy's favorite treat is strawberry yogurt" Erza nodded in agreement then looked at kazumi who was enjoying every taste of the strawberry cake she had and keith eating a chocolate bar

"Will you please stop eating like an animal" Kasai lightly scolded nashi while wiping the food on her face the sweatdropped when she went back to scarfing down the food again

"Alright so you're our kids" Gray looked at the kids

They gave him a "Yeah?" look

"Nii-san knows" Kazumi said with a fork in her mouth

"Alright it happened like this..." He started

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**[1]: it really is for me sometimes :p**

**DUN DUN DUUUNNNN! Cliffhanger! it was getting to long for my taste so i shorted it to this point**

**Natsu: What taste?**

**Me: Natsu I will seriously punch you were the sun don't shine **

**Natsu: Alright! Stay tuned till the next chapter *Whispers* If there is one..**

**Me: *Throws a chair at him* Stop being a Douchebag, ass! *turns to reader* Of course there is gonna be a next chapter so next time**

**Natsu: Hey i thought i was a douchebag not an ass**

**Me: Natsu!**

**Natsu: 0 _ 0 BYE! *Runs away***


	2. Chapter 2

**I meant to upload this alot of weeks ago ; v ; Somehow my computer had a bug well it said it needed to be repaired so I dont know for sure (I have a Windows 8) so im doing this from my phone so Enjoy! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕****)ﾉ*******

**|*Happy late birthday to Sammi-chan/Kaze-chan *Hug* I guess dis ish yo present Gurls late present dat is**

**Natsu: on wit the story- Why are you in the corner**

**Me: Whats to come is mind boggling dont take it to srsly okay pls! my big cousin gave me one of the ideas that was sensitive so blame her**

**Natsu: Um mushrooms..**

**Me: *Falls* Read and Review pls**

**Lucy: Key-chan doesn't own Fairy tail**

**Me: Damn right I don't *Passes out again***

**|*Side note| Its raining and lighting HARD It sounds like my window ish gonna burst or Sumtin ; u ; Me no gusta**

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**If you know a good beta-reader PM me please**

**.:|Chapter Warning|:. Language, That time of month, Sumtin else to come up but mostly language**

**.:|Word Count|:. 1,307 originally supposed to be 2,000+ But that's for the next chap.**

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**~PREVIOUSLY~**

_"Alright so you're our kids" Gray looked at the kids, they gave him a "Yeah?" look_

_"Nii-san knows" Kazumi said with a fork in her mouth_

_"Alright it happened like this..." He started_

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"We were done with a mission with uncle natsu and this lady gave us a origami crane" Keith put a finger up to emphasize his point

"-And that origami crane was magical, powerful in fact!" Nashi and kasai added in unison happily

"Maybe thats why she warned us not to use it and give it to mama and daddy" Nashi said, pouting

"Why would she want us to handle a powerful type of magic" Lucy blinked a few times

"Huh?..Oh right! you're a part of the magic council along with uncle gray and auntie erza but you're the highest, practically auntie erza and uncle gray's boss" Nashi had her wide goofy grin on

"HAH! IM YOUR BOSS FROST BREATH!" Natsu roared

"OH YOU WANNA GO GAYLORD!" Gray did that ninja move to say 'Come on'

"YOU'RE ON TWINKLE TOES!" Natsu threw a punch and they started to fight

"Oh god help them" Lucy muttered in unison with kasai

"Go beat him up! you can do it!" Nashi cheered and natsu smirked and hit gray harder

"Go dad he cant contain you awesomeness!" Zayd added and gray smirked and tried to hit natsu but the pinket duck and tried to trip the ice mage but was defeated by a duck

"Im awesomer than you charcoal brain" Gray growled and head butted with natsu

"Oh yea well im your boss so that makes me superior in many ways!"

"Haha look mama daddy and uncle gray are kissing again" Nashi tried to joke when she saw her aunt's expression

"This**_ fight will_**stop wont it because all I see is_** natsu**_ and **_gray_** getting me strawberry short _cake_" Erza said with venom dripping off of every syllable

"Yes ma'am we will get that cake ma'am!" The two stopped fight and started handshaking to the door

"Wow.." Nashi said, the end of her smirk twitching, She knew how it felt to be scolded by auntie erza but not like that

"That'll teach you next time you goofy off" Kasai flicked nashi's forehead, automatically her face had a healthy shade of pink on as she held her forehead

"N-n-nii-chan!"

"What?"

As soon as he turned his head to nashi a book was smashed in his face, Nashi then ran out the door

"I hate you nii-chan!"

"Gah now I gotta go get her!" Kasai groaned and followed after her, Zayd stood at his seat, he was alone with two ladies, Two** scary** ladies, Well at least one of them were nice

.

.

"So..How bout that weather?" Zayd chuckled nervously

"So zayd-kun can you tell what me and natsu are in the future?" Lucy looked at zayd with puppy eyes

"As well as me and jellal"

*Glup* "P-please put the sword down and the spoon!"

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"Stupid nii-chan he knows what im going through now" Nashi wiped her tears with her sleeves

Finding a bush she stopped by it and sat down "Just like my name im nothing"

**(Kasai P.O.V)**

"Where did she go" How could I forget! now shes emotional as ever!

"No Im the strongest!" I heard uncle gray oh yeah weren't they buying aunties cake?

"Faq u I can beat you here and now!"

Gray just huffed "Go suck the fattest of cocks!" He yelled

"Idiot I can't blow myself!"

"You idiot the cake!"

"Pft Hey dad can you help look for Nashi with me"

"Oh sure _son_" He smirked at gray who had this weird and scowlful look (In reality it was a 'Fuck-you-imma-roll-out-mutherfucker-PEACE!' Look)

**(Back with Nashi)**

"Ooh hey girl" A dude walked strolled across Nashi, She left the bush and was taking a walk

'_Cant he tell im 12?'_

"Look dude I don't want trouble unless you don't want to have kids ever" Nashi hissed

"Hey hey no need to be hostile im just trying to be friendly" He smiled

_'Why_ _can't this dude have a pedo stash it could help my case alot easier!'_

"Being friendly could cause you to STOP TALKING TO A 12 YEAR OLD!" She exclaimed the man didn't flinch once

"You're cute mind if I show you a good time" He lifted nashi's chin

Nashi snatched her chin away "A good time would be you walking away!" She walked the other way at a faster pace until he grabbed her wrist

"Listen girl you are gonna do as I say" He ruffly pushed Nashi's head to the ground

"Lemme go! If you're thirsty go get some Gatorade!" Nashi kicked and squirmed as much as she tried she knew that she can't kick this guys ass now

"I don't need some when I can eat you here" He gave a sadistic smirk, Terrifying Nashi

"HELP I DONT KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER!" Nashi screamed "I KNOW YOU HEAR ME YOU HEARTLESS SUMS OF BITCHES!"

The man then slapped nashi, Holding her red cheek she looked at the man unbuckle his pants

"Shut up no ones coming"

"NASHI!" Kasai called

"NII-CHAN I DONT KNOW THIS DUDE AND HE DOING SOMETHING THAT I DONT LIKE HELLPP!"

"Nashi!"

"DADD-Mfghd!" The man took her sock and shoved it in her mouth

_'Why_ _does a sock taste like a strawberry?'_

Nashi kicked the dude's knee he let her go for a quick second but he quickly grabbed her shirt and proceeded to try and take it off

"FIRE DRAGON CUSTOM!" Kasai roared three balls of flame came towards the man incapturing him in a fiery prison** (Sounds like I described hell ._.)**

"Wha-What is this!" The man banged on the walls only to be scorched "When I get Out of here!"

"You won't be coming out of there" Kasai stood infront of the big ball of fire with natsu helping Nashi out

"Daddy he tri-" Nashi choked natsu only picked her up princess style

"Dont worry dad I got this dude!" Kasai smirked natsu nodded, Running off

"Now..There is a possibility I could get you ready for hell..oor I could let you go"

The man looked at him _'This kid..'_

"I choose hell" Kasai smirked balling his hand into a fist making the flames in the ball rise the man hissed in pain jumping from different spots to get out of the fire

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"Na-chan!" Lucy chirped hugging Nashi

"Mommy! im sorry its m-"

"Your time of the month here come on you must be uncomfortable in those clothes!" Lucy tried to fight the urge to cringe her nose her future daughter smelled of blood and she can tell natsu was trying to get the smell from his system

"Im back!"

"Hey did you do what I told you" Natsu grinned Kasai gave a similar grin back

"Oh yeah he won't be messing with little girls or women for a loooong time"

"That a boy!" Natsu grin widen as he fist pumped his future son

"Erza what happen to you?"

"Dont ask! There was a spoon! The women threaten me with a spooon!" Zayd sobbed the last part on his fathers chest

"I know how threatening the spoon is son" Gray cried with him

"Haha cr- imma go check on Nashi" Natsu changed his mind on what he was about to say from Erza's death glare that said 'You-Better-Rethink-That-Sentence-Before-I-get-My- Spoon' look

"NOT THE SPOON!" Zayd had flashbacks

"Now I know how mom felt" Kasai whispered slowing backing out the door _'Idiots'_

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**|The next chapter 2 weeks or less|**

**idk but after reading the extra reviews I got this inspiration! so yeah Oh! I wanna know your opinions**

**Q: Should I put one of my stories for adoption it's for Imaginary Skies?**

**I dunno I was wondering if another person would like to turn it into a Multi-chapter**


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